Falling out of love is hard. Falling for betrayal is worst. Broken trust and broken hearts.Thinking all you need is there, building faith on love is worst. Empty promises will wear...I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together... ---and this ladies & gentlemen, is what I choose to live by.
Everything does happen for a reason. There was a reason I met you on that joyous day. There was a reason I fell in love with your smile. And there was a reason why I believed the words "I love you". It will simply take time for me to completely understand WHY. I'd like to think that it was a blessing from God. I mean most people live their lives never knowing what love is. It might have been a "low-budget" kind of love but it was love or as some may have also seen it as "young" love but it was love. And I am fortunate to have had that.
People change so that you can learn to let go. Otherwise most of us ladies would still be lingering around the men that are bad for us. Change is not always bad. Though you changed for the worst-it was best for me. Through your change, I realized that I deserved better. If it wasn't for the change I would have been stuck with you on a road that was filled with betrayal.
Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right. Though our relationship did not work out, I know in the back of my mind that God has something planned for me. Whether it is bigger or better or not, my faith is what keeps me strong and if that day comes I will appreciate it with all my heart. Sadly, thanks to you, I know now how it feels to be betrayed and cheated on... an experience that will help me prosper in future relationships-and maybe that's how I'll appreciate it...when it's right (in other words-not you).
You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself. Though this may seem like a logical thing to do it's not always the best thing to do. Blocking everyone from your trust is never the answer. I refuse to cease trusting people because I was betrayed by YOU (as in ONE person). That only proved to me that my secret password to my heart should simply be a little bit stronger next time. I believed your lies and I do admit that for a second I did not trust anyone but myself but then I realized that if I let you have that type of control over me-I would have let you win and I refuse to let you have the ball on MY court.
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. We fell apart. And we continue to fall further and further apart. But instead of falling asleep countless nights with tears in my eyes, I chose to pray. I pray that one day I will find someone that will value/cherish me as much as I cherish them.
I love you Geuny. And you will forever be that one love, my Moiiii, but I LOVE MYSELF MORE. And that's why I let you go. Sure, it was hard for me but I know it was the right thing to do. And that is how that chapter concludes.
Today, I actually caught an episode of The Maury Show and it made me sad to see all these females turning to Maury for help. They want him to help them figure out whether or not their boyfriends are cheating on them... Ummm, excuse me- I can't seem to comprehend why two people would choose to be in a "relationship" if there is no love or some kind of feeling just like it. I mean girl, if you found panties (not in your size) that are not yours in your bedroom- would you call that love? I think not. And it's so sad to see what society has made "love" or "relationships" to be. People now a days get together for the hook up. Most aren't really out there for their search of true love--and that's actually what a relationship should be about... looking for that person you simply can't live with out. I don't know, it may sound "old fashioned" but that's just what I think.
Another day, another lesson learned.
-Celi
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